Call It Love

More often than not we have explanations for  our actions, what is significant to us should not affect other who we "love" or rather we are in love with, sometimes we expect  so much from our partner that they bear the cost of our pain or least accommodate our stress thus ending up overstepping our boundaries with our expectations.  it happens most of the times as partners expect their spouses to behave like their "mums& dads" to constantly remind them of their parental figures or accept sexless relationship cause we are tired or not in the mood of it.

Why do we tend to put a lot of our energy into seeing that our partners show or behave in ways that please our ego but we do least to mold their characters that we desire in ourselves? it's much easier to complain about your partner even for our own mistakes. Take this biblical phrase that Jesus uses" it easier to see a spec in your friends eye than in your own" so change starts with us in order to reduce our stress! we really need to deal with the effects of our relationship with our partners in a solid and soberly way or rather try to find ways to cope with her, your parents, children  and most significant of all finding time for your husband or wife.

Taking responsibility for our actions is not easy for most mates in relationships but to justify their actions by making him/her responsible is much easier," men may tend to use work issue as a fact to justify why it's hard for them to spend time with their loved ones. or when her denies him sex and rationalize it with working all day so tired that she shouldn't expect her to be excited, issues of previous relationships, being upset by our partners silence cause you equate it to unspoken hostility, or dis-organized partner because we are compulsively neat?" in all this we all see the other as the cause of the problem not us. Instead of listening and  re establishing a mutual satisfying relationship.
In any relationship its often important to understand that we are all imperfect and we may have been driven to behave as we do because of other issues such as stress, fear, guilt or childhood trauma instead, we self-righteously assert that we value our self so much to put up with our partners concerns or reactions. No matter how imperfect our partners are they are a gift to us, a reflection of our being, companion and a blessing to us instead of an impediment to a fun love life for our relationship to blossoms.